Today… Writing and Rewriting.

I’m not doing so well today… that’s the only thing I am 100% sure of. I’m reconsidering almost every aspect of my life- my currently life that is… relationships that are flailing, career goals struggling to remain in focus. I’m feeling very small, unappreciated, unnoticed, ineffective… at a loss.

Earlier this week, I had pushed my plans to move to Spain out a whopping three years. A year longer than I had anticipated originally. I was trying to make room for everything I wanted to accomplish before I leave, mainly an English BA in classic English Lit. I added a lot of expenses to it too, things that take time to pay for and pay off, when in the grand scheme of things, it’s really just prolonging the move, and really not for any reason good enough to allow it to hold things up.

My expenses sheet is long… daunting really, and I keep tacking on things… things that are probably pretty unnecessary and will just keep me from realizing my goals sooner. I have to get back to the drawing board… get back to basics… Get the BS out of my system and realize this is not going to be a perfect move. But as long as I’ve prepared properly, I will have at least that to fall back on.